Frequently Asked Questions

What do mentors and mentees do?
The activities of each mentor/mentee relationships are unique. Mentors and mentees should call or e-mail each other at least once a week, and should get together periodically to talk and participate in activities either within the chapter’s adaptive sports programming or on their own. A form should be supplied to keep a record of all contacts and to log activities. Keep in mind that this is not a "buddy" relationship, but one that furnishes inspiration, self-esteem and nurturing for both parties. Mentors often provide academic support, attention, concern, and an interest in the well-being of the mentee. Participating in sports/recreation programming together can help the participants form a strong bond while promoting a physically active lifestyle.

Who are mentors and how are they chosen?
Mentors are volunteers who are at least 18 years of age, with or without a disability. A mentor in the DS/USA Youth Sports Mentoring Program may be a volunteer affiliated with the chapter, perhaps an adaptive sports instructor, or could be anyone interested in helping to guide and motivate a youth with a disability. Mentors should be chosen through applications, interviews with ongoing background checks to ensure the safety of the youth. Adult volunteers who are interested in participating in the DS/USA Youth Sports Mentoring Program as a mentor should contact their local chapter to express their interest.

Who are mentees?
Mentees in this program are youth, ages 6-21, who experience a disability and who are interested in getting more involved in sports/recreation while also gaining an experienced friend to learn from and gain fond experiences with. Youth who are interested in participating in the DS/USA Youth Sports Mentoring Program should contact their local chapter to express their interest. It is important to note that parents need to be fully involved in the entire process of their child’s participation in the mentoring program.

Is there anything that mentors and mentees should not do?
Mentors and mentees should refrain from any activity that would seem questionable, especially if they are of the opposite gender. This may include outings and activities without other persons, inappropriate behavior, use of hand language, etc. Mentors and mentees should always present themselves in the best manner at all times. Mentors should not take on the role of parent, professional therapist or social worker.

Here is what Mentors should do:

• Be flexible & patient.
• Set realistic expectations. Know your limits.
• Expect ups & downs in the relationship. Appreciate both the similarities & differences you & your mentee share.
• Encourage mentee to try new activities
• Use situations as “teachable moments” where you discuss the youth’s behavior, consequences and alternatives.
• Make sure your mentee is wearing necessary protective gear for physical activities.
• Enlist your mentee to help you plan outings.
• Contact staff if you have concern

Conversely, mentors should NEVER do any of the following:

• Intake any alcohol or drugs before or during the time you spend with your mentee.
• Force mentee to participate in activities if they do not wish to
• Go on overnight trips with your mentee.
• Take all of the responsibility for planning activities and/or initiating contact with your mentee.
• Take sides in a mentee’s family dispute.
• Physically discipline your mentee or use the “silent treatment” as a form of discipline.
• Make inappropriate, embarrassing or hurtful remarks to your mentee.
• Allow the mentoring relationship to terminate for any reason without notifying a staff person.

What if I don't recruit enough mentors?
Choosing more mentors than you need is a good idea, because you can keep their names on file for later. You should try to get more mentors if you don't have enough, so that each young person is assigned to his or her own mentor. If, however, you cannot get enough adults to participate, you may have to assign more than one mentee to an adult, but be sure each mentor established a one-on-one relationship with each mentee.

What do I do if the mentors and mentees don't get along?
Talk to the mentor and the mentee to find out what problems they are having. Don't give up immediately - give the mentor and the mentee their time to develop their relationship, perhaps two months or longer. This is a good opportunity to learn new forms of crisis management -- the resolution of difference in a manner in which both parties can live with the solution. If after that time there is still friction, talk to both of them again to see if their differences can be worked out. If not, reassign the two to other persons. By all means, try to keep them both participating in the program. Remember, everyone does not get along; your program is not "bad" if this happens.

How long should a mentoring program last?
Chapters are encouraged to start their mentoring programs by at least enrolling a few mentor-mentee matches to participate in their adaptive sports/recreation programming. It may take some time to fully develop a mentoring component. Evaluate your program at the end of the adaptive sports programming and/or the end of the year, and make changes as necessary. Be optimistic -- plan on adding more mentors to your program and expanding your activities.

What are the current trends in mentoring?
There are several issues gaining interest and support in mentoring. Background checks of prospective mentors are necessary due to concerns of child abuse and criminal activity. Many programs train and certify their mentors. Although there is also a trend to match mentors and mentees who differ greatly in ethnicity, values, age, and/or creed, many young people need "sameness". Partnerships with well-established mentoring organizations are also a new trend, giving mentees the added experience and exposure to persons in the professional world.

What should a mentor expect from a mentee?
Make sure your mentors understand that they will be working with young people who think and act like young people. They should not expect perfection, nor should they be surprised at what the young people say or do. It is important for mentors to be prepared for the difference in values and opinions relevant to education, religion, politics -- any subject. Mentees may also shun the mentors in the beginning because they are different -- too old, from a different ethnic background, or "stuck up". Encourage the mentors to be open to and to respect new opinions, experiences, and values of the mentees. Also encourage them to refrain from forcing their own values on the mentees.

What should a mentee expect from a mentor?
Make sure your mentees understand that they will be working with adults, and that they should respect them. They should not expect the impossible from the mentor. Encourage the mentees to be open to and respect new opinions, experiences, and values of the mentors. Mentees should also be able to count on their mentors -- this establishes trust and confidence in an adult. A commitment or promise made to a mentee should be kept, barring extreme emergencies.

What makes a mentoring program successful?
Successful mentoring depends on the "give and take" of the relationship. Mentees must feel that their best interests are being met, and that their mentors and persons involved in the program are committed to them. Mentors must feel that they are contributing to the growth and well being of the mentees. Providing the mentor-mentee match with opportunities to participate in chapter’s adaptive sports/recreation programming together.

How can I incorporate mentoring into my chapter’s existing program?
Please contact Disabled Sports USA to inquire how your chapter can incorporate a mentoring component within your existing programming:

Adam Scott
DS/USA Youth Sports Mentoring Program Manager
240-268-1250
ascott@dsusa.org

Disabled Sports USA headquarters will work one-on-one with each interested chapter to identify which mentoring model(s) would best fit into their adaptive sports/recreation programming, to explore partnership opportunities with local mentoring organizations, and to schedule mentor training sessions.

If you have additional questions, concerns or suggestions, please e-mail them to ascott@dsusa.org.